The Long and Winding Road

When I started this journey, I had only one goal in mind. My final "goal weight." I had a general idea of when I wanted to reach this ultimate number on the scale, but I hadn't gone any deeper than that. As it turns out, it's much harder to lose weight when you're a mom.

I've mentioned this briefly in a previous post, but I lost a decent amount of weight pre-baby. I didn't document weight or measurements well, so I don't recall the exact amount I lost. More than likely, it was between 50-70 pounds.

The left is me at my heaviest (pre-baby and well covered up, as I always was). I would say I'm pushing 200 there. The right is near the lowest I ever remember being in my life, in the mid 140s. 

I slowly regained 20 pounds throughout 2010 before getting pregnant with Wyatt. 

Note to self: it's a lifestyle  change. You don't stop living a healthy lifestyle just because you can fit in a size 4 or 6.

Sadly, I don't have one single photo of my pregnancy. A decision that devastates me and will probably haunt me for the rest of my life. I was disgusted with myself. Disgusted that after a year of hard work and dedication, I got myself back to that point. Instead of taking control of things during my pregnancy, I ate whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. Bed rest did not help that situation either.  I gained roughly 50 pounds in those 9 months. 

Life has its twists and turns - and mine took a drastic change (beyond being a newly expectant mother) shortly before "d-day". I was put on bed rest at 8 months pregnant, had a very difficult birth ending up in emergency c-section, found myself newly single, a new mom, and had to return to work with my 1 week old newborn. I don't remember much about that time. It truly is a blur. We made it through, but needless to say, I didn't "have time" to work out or eat healthy (or so I convinced myself). 

I gave myself until Wyatt's first birthday. Once he turned one, it would be sooo much easier (or so I told myself.) The past year was the year of illnesses, no joke. Wyatt has had well over 10 ear infections in the past 16 months, among other illnesses and followed by a broken bone or two..

October 2012

I used these things as excuses. (Ok, well the two months I spent trying to get over pneumonia wasn't an excuse, that was legit) Excuses to be lazy and miserable. Which, by the way, why do we look for excuses to stay miserable?? Ridiculous.

Finally, this past Spring, I'd had enough excuses and I took control. I assumed it was warmer weather, we're healthy, it will be a breeze this time of year. (Once again, thinking temporary and not lifestyle). It's only two months in and I've had a few health setbacks already. This has caused me to miss a total of 3 weeks of workouts. The old me would have given up and told myself "maybe next year." But not this time. This time I'm determined to meet my goals.

However, I'm realizing this week that I need more than one "ultimate" goal. So, as silly as this sounds, my goal this week is to come up with some short term goals. 2013 will be my year! ;) 

Motivation Monday and Mother's Day

Today I'm linking up with Wendy and CeCe for Motivation Monday.




I've been a bit down on myself this past week as far as weightloss and fitness go. Last Monday I started feeling a bit under the weather, but was able to push through a workout. Come Tuesday morning, my throat was on fire, my sinuses were so plugged I sounded like my grandparent's ancient Pug; I had a fever and with that came chills and body aches. It was NOT fun. And it's lingered, all week. 
Yesterday was my weigh in. I most definitely didn't lose and was feeling defeated. I decided to pull out the tape measure to re-take my waist and hip measurements just knowing that they would be equally disappointing. (What can I say, it's been a Tiffany pity party all week over here). The tape measure proved to be just the opposite...
I started this journey the beginning of March. I've had a few setbacks along the way already, from my stress fractures to the never-ending-illness of May 2013, but I have still managed to lose 7" just from my waist and hips (15 pounds down at this point). That was the pick-me-up I've been needing! When you're going through a hard time, or not seeing the changes when you look in the mirror, it can get discouraging and so easy to give up on yourself. 
My advice: 
1. DON'T! Don't give up. Find any little victory to keep yourself going. Look at the big picture and try to stay focused on why you're on this journey. 

2. There is more to weight loss and a healthy lifestyle than the number on the scale. Track your measurements and take before and after pictures so you can see your progress. I took "before" pictures a little late in the game (after I'd already lost 10 pounds). I haven't looked at those pictures yet. Silly, right? I'm just not ready to see them. But, I know that someday, and that day will come, I'm going to want to look back and remember where I was. 

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Happy late Mother's Day to all you mommies out there! 

I love this little guy more than words can say and am so grateful to be his Mama! 

He turns 2 in less than 2 weeks!! I just can't believe it! We'll be out of town right around his birthday, so he got an early surprise from Nanny and Poppy yesterday.

Candy Bouquet

My older brother is the greatest gift giver known to man. He puts me to shame every birthday and Christmas. Every year it's something unique, thoughtful and perfect and I'm always left thinking to myself, "Why didn't I think of that?" I'm the opposite. It doesn't matter how hard I try to come up with the greatest gift ideas, I fail. I never know what to get anyone.

May is full of birthdays, anniversaries, Mother's Day, as well as my little brother's high school graduation this year. I came up with (Pinterest may have helped) a last minute birthday gift that would work for just about anyone in your life. A candy bouquet...

It's pretty self explanatory really... I taped the candy bars to colored straws and poked them down into a candy filled cup. Ta-da!! 

I'm still fighting this nasty bug and have felt too yucky to push through a workout the past few days. This will put me a week behind in JMBR, but oh well! Life happens. I'll redo week 6 next week and keep pluggin' along. I'm hoping to get a couple runs in this weekend if I'm feeling up to it. It's supposed to be warm and I want to take advantage of it!

TGIF,

Finish the Sentence Link-up

I've been a bit under the weather this week, so what better way to pass the miserable time than a link-up with Holly and Jake.

Unlike my sibling(s) (that I love very much).... I'm female. 

My best friend says... I got the crazy in me. But what does he know? ;)

People call me... Tiff, Tiffers, Shorty, with a few un-pleasantries  thrown in from time to time I am sure.

I most often dream... about stuffing my face with cake by the handfuls like it's the last cake on earth. Or being surrounded by Jellyfish - the single most terrifying creature on earth. Don't believe me? Look it up - they kill more people than sharks annually. Evil.

The best part of my day... is Wyatt screaming, "Mama!" and running into my arms when I pick him up at daycare. That is, on the days he didn't have 317 timeouts before 7am.

I really don't understand... man logic. Why can't you just think like a woman sane person.

I get really annoyed... When I answer the phone at work at the person says "can you hold a minute?" No, I can't hold! You called me you inconsiderate...

There's nothing like a... nice, snowy day in May. Come on Wyoming, get your seasons straight!

Lately, I can't get enough... exercise! Darn near-death illness needs to go away!

One thing I am NOT is... well-rested. I've tried convincing the little one that there is nothing going on at 4am. I don't think he believes me.

I spent too much money on... birthdays this month! Was everyone born in May? 

I want to learn.... to operate a hot air balloon. For real. It's on the bucket list.

If I ever met _____________ , I would... Jillian...act like a tween Bieber fan. There would be no controlling myself. Once I convinced her to be my bff, I'd get her to kick my butt at the gym.

I can't stop... weighing myself ten thousand times a day. Someone needs to steal my scale. Seriously. 

Never have I ever... left the country... or the northwestern United States for that matter. This girl needs to see the world someday!

Reese Witherspoon... is one classy drunk. And I love her for it.

Sweat it Out They Say...

I don't know who came up with the saying, "The best way to beat a cold is to sweat it out." But they lied and should be ashamed of themselves.

I woke up Monday morning feeling a bit under the weather. Sore throat, can't breathe out of the nose etc... Basically I was sure I was on my death bed. I remembered the above lie saying and have heard Jillian say if your symptoms are above the shoulders, you can still exercise. So exercise I did.

It was not pretty. In fact, it was pathetic and I've never hated Jill more than I did in that moment. But I got through it. While fighting the desire to rip my burning throat out with my bare hands, I actually felt a little proud of myself even. I have never worked out through an illness. I've always taken it as an excuse to give up - but not this time.

As silly as it may seem, it was a big moment for me. A realization that I'm really in this. That I do have what it takes to reach my goals and that I'm not going to let anything get in the way of that. 

With that being said, they did lie though. It did not make my near-death illness go away. In fact, it's far worse today. But, it did force me to jump a big hurdle and I can't wait to be on the mend so I can give it my all. 

Homemade Sensory Paint

In recent months, Wy has started getting a few little "quirks" when it comes to textures. Bath time was once his favorite time of day, but is now dreaded, by both of us. He loves the water, but hates the feeling of soap and shampoo. He throws a Genius World Record type tantrum anytime something sticks to his hand. Brushing teeth and trimming fingernails is a two person job, quite literally.

So, I do what we all do when we need ideas and suggestions, and I turned to Pinterest. I found a recipe for homemade sensory paint and gave it a go this weekend.

This is the one and only time he touched the "paint". 

Yup, I made him touch it once and there was no continuing until we cleaned him up. It doesn't paint very well with a brush as it's pretty thick stuff. He had fun none-the-less and we'll definitely try it again sometime. 

It's super simple to make:

2 C cold water

1/2 C corn starch

3 T sugar

Whisk over medium heat until it boils and starts to thicken. Separate and add food coloring. 

*You'll want to use paint shortly after it has cooled*

If all else fails, he says it tastes good.

Confessions of a Chubster on a Skinny Journey

Confession: I have a scale obsession, and I'm not ready to give it up. When I say obsession, I mean multiple times a day. I strip down to the undies several times a day and check in to find the scale hasn't changed from 2 hours ago. So then I think, maybe if I take the sports bra off, it will magically drop me 2 pounds (even though it didn't yesterday).

Confession: I LOVE Dr. Pepper. I haven't had one in weeks and I miss it. I might die if I don't have some soon. For real.

Confession: I've been dreaming about cake. Literally. Dreams of stuffing my mouth, by the handful, with the most delicious chocolate cake you've ever set your eyes on. This could be because Wyatt's birthday is coming up, or it could be the fatty in me coming out. Is it bad that I'm planning his cake around my favorites, rather than his? He's 2, he won't remember if it's chocolate instead of confetti. Right?

Confession: Every day I have an internal debate over Gilmore Girls vs. Jillian. Jillian wins because I'm scared of her, and I'm certain she would climb through the TV and kick my butt if I missed a workout. However, I love my Gilmore Girls. I've watched the entire series over 10 times. No Joke. Ummm, that might explain part of why I'm on this journey, eh?

Confessions to be continued. But, in other news, it's Friday and the sun is out in Wyoming!! 

Someone was a little over dramatic about it on the way to daycare today. I think that's a sign that we need some warm weather already! Here's to Spring! (Knock on wood)