Skip the Bun, Please - NSV

Let's talk non-scale victories, since I clearly don't have any scale related victories to celebrate, yet.

My little brother is a freshman at the University of Wyoming here in Laramie. He comes over every other week or so to do laundry at our place. I always make a point to make him dinner and give him a break from cafeteria food. Last night, he requested cheeseburgers.

Day 1 wheat free, and I was going to make cheeseburgers and fries. Yikes! I love me a good cheeseburger. A nice, big bun, tons of mayo, ketchup and pickles. Mmmm. The thought is enough to make my mouth water. For the first time, well... probably ever, I didn't give in or justify a cheat. I had the hamburger (lean) patty with a nice big helping of veggies and didn't feel deprived at all. 

Breakfast this morning is a boiled egg and some fruit. It's hard to skip the toast, but I know that will get easier in time. I have a big salad planned for lunch. Veggies and cheese for a snack. Dinner will be something with chicken. Fail to plan - plan to fail, right?

What non-scale victories have you had recently?

Wheat Belly Wednesday - Edition 1

Disclaimer: Minor panic attack hitting "publish" this morning. Yet, it's refreshing and I'm feeling good!

We're just going to start fresh with this Wheat Belly Wednesday business around here. Illnesses and injuries are, knock on wood, behind us. I'm starting this journey of mine over, at least physically. This is a new beginning, so it seemed fitting to take it back to numero uno.

God willing, every Wednesday around these parts will be "Wheat Belly Wednesday." Since this is the first week, here's my plan:

• Every Wednesday I will be weighing in and sharing that number here on the blog.. eeeekkk. This is not an easy thing for me to do, but it's a huge motivator for me. 
• I'll share progress pictures every 10 pounds
• Update on my week in regards to nutrition. ie: what I'm eating, how I'm feeling etc... As well as how it's effecting my autoimmune disorders. Which, is the main reason I am choosing to try this lifestyle
• I'll share anything that stands out to me in the book, videos, other blogs etc... knowledge is key and I want to get my hands on all of it.

A question I'm getting a lot through the blog, as well as friends and family that I've mentioned Wheat Belly to, is "Why on earth would you want to do that?" This is not some fad diet to me nor am I looking for some quick "fix". That needs to be clear.  With my Lupus being considered "active" at the moment, one of the few treatment plans is prednisone. I'm sure from all my complaining these past few months, you have probably all caught on that I hate the stuff. A lifetime of prednisone and other nasty drugs is a last resort in my book. I want a life I can live to the fullest and feel my best doing it.

So, I started doing some research. There are some studies showing the possibility of a wheat free diet being beneficial in autoimmune patients. It sounds weird to some and most don't understand my decision. That's okay. I don't expect people to understand and I completely get how they are skeptical. It may help; it may not. Only time will tell. All I know is it's worth a shot.

I need to give myself "mini challenges" to kick things off, so I've decided to commit to 21 days wheat free. Statistically, it's supposed to take the body and mind 21 days to adjust to new things. It's a do-able time frame. I can do anything for 21 days, right? No cheats. None, what-so-ever for the first 21 days. Once I've reached that point, I will re-evaluate and go from there. I don't know if I will go 80/20, more or less. It will all depend on how I feel. But, I want to kick start and flush it all out of my system, so 100% for now.

I love all things carbs. This could be more challenging than my week-long labor and birth with Wyatt. But, i feel I'm truly ready to push through mentally this time. These past few months have taught me a lot about what I don't want to feel like on a daily basis. Maybe, it's been a blessing in disguise.

Enough of the long winded rambling. On to the weigh-in and measurements:

Don't mind the unpainted toe. I need to take care of that now that it's healed!

 In all it's scary glory. Honestly, I'm not surprised by that number. It's actually better than I thought it would be, sad to say.

Measurements:

Tummy (right below belly button): 42.5
Hip: 42
Waist: 40
Chest: 39
Bust: 44
L Upper Thigh: 24
Left quad (directly above knee: 17.25
L Calf: 15.25
R Upper Thigh: 25
R Quad: 18.5
R Calf: 16
L Upper Arm: 13
R Upper Arm: 13

Originally, I was going to address the exact number of gains (and eventually, I'm sure I'll have a post about it). If you want to know, I'm sure you can look back in the archives, ha. But, I'm choosing not to focus on the what could have beens and what ifs. All I care about is the here and now. For my own sanity and happiness, I'm viewing this as a fresh start and new beginning rather than failures. I've wallowed long enough, it's time to get to work!

Also, linking up with Liz for the blog hop today. If you haven't checked out her blog, you really should. She is incredibly inspiring and sweet as can be!

Plans & Goals

After a month of no legitimate, breaking-a-sweat, type of workouts - it's hard to get back to it! I was pumped up all day, until the second we walked through the door last night. I felt as though I was walking the plank as I headed to my room to put my workout gear on.  I knew it was going to suck. I knew I was extremely out of shape and it was not going to be enjoyable.

I was right. It did in fact suck. Until I had finished, then I felt absolutely amazing. There is no greater stress reducer than a great workout in my opinion. One 30 minute sweat sesh and I felt like the weight of the world had lifted off my shoulders.

Originally, my "where do I go from here?" plan consisted of T25 for the workouts with running thrown in. The boys gave me T25 for Christmas, and I haven't gone more than one week healthy since then in order to complete the program. This was my chance!

So, I put it in the DVD player and it took me all of 3 minutes before I remembered that you spend a good 90% of the workouts on your toes. Normally, this is great - work those calves! But, on a broken toe? Not so great...

I pushed through the workout though. I had to modify a few of the moves and threw my shoes off the last 8 minutes. But, I survived. I can handle some discomfort for 30 minutes, but I had to get real with myself last night. T25 is not going to work right now while my toe is still healing. Back to square one on the fitness front...

I contemplated several different options last night before it hit me: Jillian Michael's Body Revolution. This is the program that started my weight loss this time last year. This is the program that had me motivated and I saw amazing results with it. Why not repeat it? So that's what I'm going to do. JMBR Round 2. I'll be upping my weights and modifying for my toe as needed.

Normally, I work out at night after work. I want to work on changing that to mornings. Wyatt is up at 5 every morning, anyways. I just need to push myself to get moving and get the workout out of the way. My hope is by doing the workout in the morning, it will give us more time to get runs in after work on nice days. Wyatt looooves going for a run in the jogging stroller.

So, that's my fitness plan.

Nutrition is going to be very clean. I'm going to be doing a 21 Day Fix/Grain Free hybrid if you will. Basically, very clean eating while eliminating grains. I'm not going to be counting calories. Honestly, I've counted enough calories in my life that I have a vague idea of where I lie on any given day. Calorie counting doesn't work for me. I hate it and it actually hurts my progress. If calorie counting is what works for you, that is awesome! I'm just sharing what works/doesn't work for myself, personally.

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{GOALS} - April/May

I need some goals in my life right now. Something to keep me focused...

1. 20 pound loss by Wyatt's birthday party May 31st.

 First off, this sounds a bit high, yes. But please remember, I've been on prednisone almost non-stop for months. I've retained a lot of water. The first bit of weight  loss will be from the meds, not fat loss. Just a little something to keep in mind. 

Secondly, that's 10 pounds a month. A little steep, but definitely not an unhealthy number.

2. Morning Workouts 3 days a week

3. At least 1 lunch run, 1 after work run, and 1 weekend run a week. I miss hitting the pavement and need to ease back into the running game

4. Wheat Free - I'm challenging myself to 21 days 100% wheat free to start - no cheats.(I'm officially starting this tomorrow so my weekly check-ins line up with Wheat Belly Wednesday)

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I'm also changing my weekly weigh-ins to Wednesday so that I can update everything all at once. I haven't weighed yet, but promise I will be in the morning. I wish I could say I was looking forward to it... but, I feel more like having a panic attack. Things can only go up from here! (well, except for the number on the scale... that can go down).

Motivation Monday: Bump in the Road

 

We took a little road trip over the mountain to Saratoga, WY yesterday so Brad could watch some Pros play in a pool tournament. There's something about the mountains that brings me such peace. On the way home, I couldn't help but think back over the past year and snapped the above picture from the truck to reflect my thoughts in the moment.

Last summer, Brad and I took a backpacking trip, over 6 miles total. The hike was through water, over boulders and all types of terrain. I made the trip with ease. At times, feeling as though I could have ran portions where there was actual trail. I felt on top of the world in the moment, both literally and figuratively.

Never did I think I would be back to square one almost a year later. 

I've known that I'd have to write this blog post for a couple of weeks. While I have touched on it briefly here and there, I have really tried to avoid the whole topic.  Even though I've had this post on the brain for weeks, I am still finding it hard to find the words...

I worked hard last year and learned a lot of things along the way. My progress was much slower than anticipated, but I kept my head up (most of the time) and continued looking forward. I first got sick and started experience Lupus Flare symptoms in October. For months, I taught tooth and nail to continue progressing through the pain and sickness. Finally, in December, I reached a 29lb total loss. I felt great and was beginning to gain the confidence I had lost long ago.

Then, all the symptoms came back x100. I tried. Man, did I ever try to keep pressing forward. Truth is, my body was exhausted. My mind was exhausted. I simply couldn't workout through the aches and pains. Beyond that, I couldn't walk across the room without being winded and having a coughing attack. These couldn't (s) aren't "Eh, I didn't feel like it." They are: I, quite literally, was not capable of these things. 

Enter the evil prednisone. Not only does it make you retain water like you're 9 months pregnant with pre-eclampsia, but the hunger is unreal. Evil, evil, prednisone. I wanted to eat healthy, I did. But truth be told, I gave in far too many times in past month. One positive thing, I did make more frequent healthy choices than I would have if this had been one year ago. So, there's that.

The day I found out about round 1093980739 of bronchitis for the year, I also broke my big toe AND had to take Wyatt back into the doctor after my x-rays for his 3rd round of antibiotics in 2 months. We won't go back into all of that - my point is: Luck has not been on my side and I haven't handled it the best I could. 

Weight loss and fitness journey's aren't all happy-go-lucky moments. They aren't rainbows and unicorns all the time. They aren't easy. No matter what anyone portrays out there, at the gym or on some random blog, they struggle, too. Even if they'll never admit it. It's not always easy to turn down dessert or all the pizza and burgers. It's not always easy to make your workout a priority. And, sometimes, real life situations are going to get in the way. Some things are completely out of your control.

The real change in a person happens when they decide what to do with the things they are dealt. The real change happens when they take slip-ups, no matter how big or how small, as a bump in the road. Not an end-all.

That's where I am. I'm feeling better. Much better. The prednisone is gone - for now...  I haven't weighed in yet (I will tomorrow morning after I dig my scale out), but I can tell you that I will not be surprised if I'm starting over - 100% from the beginning. I've been struggling internally with that thought and trying to overcome the negative talk that comes with it. I can't change the past. It is what it is. All I can do is work my butt off from here on out.

I hope you guys will all stick around as I start this journey over. The great thing about the past year, is I've learned a lot about myself and my body which should make all the difference in my success this time around. I need accountability right now, so I'll be bringing back weekly weigh-ins. 

More on my plan, weigh-in, measurements to come tomorrow!

A Very Random - 5 on Friday

It's Friday and my blood pressure is coming back down from my little vent yesterday, just in time for the weekend. I know I had said I'd have the full potty training post up this week, but we'll just bump it to the next.

It wouldn't be the close of a week without 5 On Friday, so...

{ONE}

This was my Friday morning. Wyatt insisted he cover me in kisses before we left the house, which basically makes me the luckiest mommy in the world. After being up all night wiping his nose and trying to keep him calm with all his coughing, it was very much needed. Please keep positive thoughts for us as we have a big doctor's appointment on Monday!

Even though he's not feeling well, there have been zero accidents since Sunday. Zero! I'm so proud of my little guy.

{TWO}

A little Flashback Friday to last summer's hiking...

I am itching to get back to the mountains! Will the snow ever end? We've been having a really awesome winter this spring. Sigh


I've lived down in this part of Wyoming over 7 years, and I honestly still don't know the area well. I think I've talked Brad into showing me a few day hike places.. with trails clearly marked... that I can safely do myself when he has Wyatt. There will definitely be some backpacking trips this summer as well, but that will not happen without Brad along. Safety first, friends... safety first. Not to mention, if a bear was to pop up in front of me, I'd think he's too cute to actually shoot - even if he started ripping me to shreds. So there's that. (That may be part of the issue I'm having with convincing Brad to show me hiking trails I can do by myself).

{THREE}

I've started the taper process of Prednisone, which is very exciting. However, it's been years and years since I've been on it for an extended period of time. I forgot a very nasty side effect of tapering - pain. It's not uncommon with the prednisone, especially in auto-immune patients.

My entire body is fragile at the moment. I mean, it literally hurts for my clothing to touch my skin. The pressure of laying down on a soft bed to go to sleep last night actually had me crying in pain. The shower this morning? Let's not even talk about how that felt. Or the fact that drying off with a towel was out of the question, so I just stood in the bathroom to air dry for what felt like an eternity.

I'm so ready for my bloated face to go back to normal, and to get to work losing the extra weight though, that the pain is almost a welcome one. It's a sign that I'm getting closer to being able to move forward. Hopefully it will just last a couple days and I will be feeling like a new me!

{FOUR}

We had my mom and little brother come over for dinner last night. Which means Wyatt's day was MADE.

Until the past year, my family have all been 7 hours away. It's been a lot of fun having them around.

{FIVE}

Warm weather will come eventually, and it will be running season again. I am in desperate need of a new running playlist. Help!

What's on your playlist??

Shame on SELF

I'm typically a pretty laid back person. I have my own opinions and thoughts on certain matters, well, just about every matter. But, I tend to keep them to myself or vent about them to close family or friends. I'm one of those people if a restaurant gets my food wrong, I'll just pick at it or take it home to give to someone else rather than speak up. It's just who I am.

With that said, it takes a lot to truly upset me enough to voice my feelings. I'm not sure what it is about this particular issue that has me in a complete rage today. Maybe it's just the timing. Maybe, it's because my aunt is a breast cancer survivor and it happens to be her birthday. Maybe, it's my involvement in I Run 4 and that Dakota is right now, as I type, sitting in the hospital receiving results from his recent testing. Maybe, it's because I'm a runner - I don't know. All I know, is I haven't been able to get the issue off my mind all morning and feel I won't be able to let it rest until I've put my feelings out there...

This morning started out like any morning - 10,000 trips to go the bathroom for Wyatt. Shower, hair and make-up for me. Breakfast served... you know the drill. I sat down on the couch and logged onto Facebook to send Dakota a message for his results day. The first thing that popped up on my newsfeed was THIS ARTICLE.

Monika Allen is a brain cancer survivor. She received an email from SELF awhile back, asking her permission to use a photo of her running the LA Marathon in a tutu/super hero outfit. I'm sure she never imagined it could be used in a negative light, and gave her blessing. The picture was posted in April's publication with this caption:

"A racing tutu epidemic has struck NYC's Central Park, and it's all because people think these froufrou skirts make you run faster," the caption reads. "Now, if you told us they made people run from you faster, maybe we would believe it."

Source: http://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/local/Magazine-Makes-Fun-of-Cancer-Survivors-Tutu-252560451.html#ixzz2xAhLRuvB
Follow us: @nbcsandiego on Twitter | NBCSanDiego on Facebook

Little did SELF know (or bother to even find out) Monika ran this marathon in the middle of chemotherapy. (Advice to SELF: THAT is newsworthy). She wore the tutu to celebrate her amazing accomplishment. To motivate herself on the run and have a little, well deserved, fun. Not only that, but she makes tutus and sells them to donate the money to a charity: Girls on the Run.

The amazing thing to me, is SELF is supposed to be a fitness and health publication.

 One that fails to understand the close-knit nature of the running community. I have participated in sports my entire life. Never have I found a community of people so supportive of all sizes, shapes, ages and abilities as runners.

One that clearly fails to understand that nearly every organized race is in support of some type of charity.

One that clearly fails to understand why anyone might want to brighten 3-50 miles. To bring a little cheer to themselves, other runners and supporters along the way. If a fun outfit can do that, why not?

One that clearly fails to understand that there are thousands upon thousands of people out there who can't run for themselves. That there are thousands of us out there dedicating our races and miles to these people. That many of them are children. In the I Run 4 group, tutus and goofy outfits are common. Members post race pictures for their buddies so they can feel a part of the race themselves. So, as a result, they go above and beyond to wear their buddy's favorite colors, characters etc...

Until  today, I've been a fan of SELF for many years. I've had subscriptions with them from time to time. I was following them on all forms of social media until this morning. But, I have no patience for ignorance, bullies, and judgements. Especially based on someone's appearance. I can't help but wonder if the "journalist" who made this comment has ever run a marathon, themselves. Until they have those 26.2 miles under their belt, or have underwent chemotherapy themselves, they should probably refrain from judging those that have.

Nice try, SELF, but I believe people will now be running faster from you... not the tutus.

Cerebral Palsy Awareness Day {Yesterday}

Side Note: Wheat Belly Wednesday will return in another week or two after Wyatt and I have finished all our crazy doctor's appointments etc... I can't wait to dig into all of this and get to work losing the pounds (again), but I'm focusing on us and all other areas of our health right now. Throwing in drastic lifestyle changes, with all else happening is too overwhelming at the moment. The prednisone hunger is real, people. It's a daily struggle. But, I'm doing my best to control it and make smart decisions in the mean time. So, there's that.

If you follow me on Instagram, you've probably already seen this. However, since it's big news in my world at the moment, I'm sharing again:

I got real shoes on my feet for the first time in a week on Monday. Progress! It's healing faster than expected, thank heavens. It's about time something went right around here. There's an occasional throb and it's pretty tender to the touch, but overall - not bad. I completely forget about it occasionally the past couple of days which is making it difficult to follow doctor's orders and not jump right back into all things fitness. Patience... 

Somehow I missed the memo that yesterday was Cerebral Palsy Awareness Day until after lunch. Bummer! I should have been rocking my green for Dakota. I couldn't let the day go by without getting out there and doing something for him. Running was out of the question, but I loaded Wyatt up after work and we headed out for a walk.

It felt great to get moving a bit. Ice was required for my toe later that night though. Maybe by the weekend, I'll be able to get a slow, short jog in and start easing back into my workouts. I'm playing it by ear and listening to my body.

Moving on to the biggest, most exciting news in our neck of the woods: Operation Potty Training has been a huge success! We started on Saturday and Wyatt has now been over 48 hours with zero accidents. Score! 

Today is the last day of his 3rd round of antibiotics in 2 months. I was hoping it was working this time, then Monday night the stuffy nose and cough returned. We go in for a follow up on Monday to determine if he needs to be seen by a specialist. I'm a big bundle of mama nerves, but know that it will all work out. He stays pretty happy and energetic during the day, so I'm grateful for that. It's a sign of some improvement at least.

Tutorial for Wyatt's potty/chore chart will be up on the blog tomorrow along with some details about our crazy weekend and what is working for us.

Happy Wednesday!