Follow Through Friday

Finally, a week where I feel as if I was actually able to follow through on my goals... for the most part. Monday was my first official day of the T25 program. I have done many at home workout programs and DVDs through the years, so far I would put T25 tied with Jillian's Body Revolution as my favorite. Short, sweet and effective.

I have switched up the schedule a bit this week. The majority of the moves require you to stay on your toes, and my calves are feeling it! Walking was difficult on Wednesday (but in a good way) and I decided rest was needed. Yesterday I was feeling great and played catch up with Total Body Circuit and Ab Intervals.

 Today should be a double day with Lower Focus and Cardio, but I'll be making them up this weekend. Instead, tonight is a much needed and long over due date night. Wyatt is going to spend the time at my mom's and I get to get out of the house for the first time in about 6 months. Ex-cit-ed!

On top of T25, I have a run planned in the freezing cold tomorrow and I'm doing the Fitfluential Burpee Challenge. 110 down, 890 to go!

I mentioned on Monday that I am trying to go wheat free to see if it will help my Lupus. It's been an adventure. There was no doubt that this would challenging for me. I love all things carbs. This week has not gone perfectly, but I'd say I'm eating only 1/4 of the wheat products I was before. That's a big accomplishment for me! I plan to hit the store this weekend and stock up with more options to make next week ever more successful. 


Now, I am allowing myself to indulge a bit tonight and I can tell you right now that I will not feel bad about it. Even if the scale reflects it. It is a very, very rare opportunity for me to go out and be Tiffany, not just Mama. Don't get me wrong, I love that little guy and cherish every moment with him. But sometimes you just need a breather and a chance to reconnect with your husband/boyfriend/significant other... This comes around only about twice a year for me, and I'm really looking forward to it!

But, it's for one night and one night only. Tomorrow will be back to healthy eating, lots of water and killing it in my workouts.

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The Facebook Accountability Group voted for a Photo Challenge for February. The ladies in this group are so amazing and keep me going some days! If you want a place to find support in your weight loss/health journey, come join us! The group is secret, so if you want in, get me your email and I can send you an invite.

 

Miracle: Day 1 T25 and Healthy

A miracle happened: I completed Day 1 of T25 (for what feels like the hundredth time) and I did not wake up sick today. I was beginning to think that disk was cursed. Hallelujah!

Day 1 of going wheat free was a success. I did have a horrible headache by the end of the day, but that's not uncommon for me and may have nothing to do with the diet change. Wyatt had a night full of night terrors, poor kid. Sleep was minimal last night. I made breakfast in my zombie state and had a piece of toast with my eggs out of habit, completely forgetting that I'm cutting that out. Oops. Honest mistake and moving forward.

Now it's confession time. I weighed in last night for the first time since completing my antibiotics and steroids. I knew I would be up, but I never imagined I would see that scary of a number. Some of that gain is from the steroids. Some is from being nearly completely inactive for a month with illnesses. And some is from making poor choices through those struggles. It was extremely disheartening. I felt really down last night. I had to fight the urge to workout excessively and forced myself to only do T25 and not workout for hours on end.

After completing my workout, I was in better spirits. Instead of wallowing in self pity, I picked myself up off the floor and took my "before" pictures for the program. (I will share pictures and weight at the end of the 10 week program) They were difficult to look at. So much of my hard work erased. But, I took comfort in knowing that I'm stronger than I once was. I've always let my health problems control me. In the past, I would have viewed this as a "sign". That it's just not meant to be and I'd let Lupus win.

That is not who I am anymore. One thing I need to accept, and I'm working on, is that these setbacks are going to happen. Sometimes, it's out of my control. As much as I hated having to go on specific medications, it was necessary. And it will be necessary again in the future. But, as long as I get back to it afterwards, I can and will achieve my goals. It's all a part of the journey and an opportunity for growth. So many have it harder than myself. Look at Dakota... my health problems are nothing compared to what he endures. At least I have the chance to workout and run. My experiences just make me respect and appreciate him more.

Which, I have to share, Dakota took the SILVER in bowling at the Special Olympics this weekend. I'm so extremely proud of him!!!

Motivation Monday

Today's theme is Healthy Super Bowl Snacks; however, I have a bit of a different view when it comes to "special events" (which, in my house, the Super Bowl most definitely is a special event). If you are going to splurge a bit. Just do it. Watch your portion sizes and get back on track the next day.

For me personally, if I'm really craving something, a low calorie, low fat variation is rarely going to satisfy me and I end up over eating. Make sure there is a veggie tray and fruit around to fill up on, but have a wing or two. Bite into that burger and get back to it the next day. "Fat free" versions of things are not good for you. Sure, the calorie count is going to be less, but you're better off eating whole foods.

Since we are on the topic of the Super Bowl, let me just say what a disappointing year this is. My two least favorite teams in the NFL have made it. Waaaahhhh. On the bright side, I won't have to worry about having a heart attack like I nearly did in the last three minutes of the 49ers game last week. My heart will mend, and Quest for 6 can continue next year!

Brad and his family are all Broncos fans (most people are around here since I live 2 hours away from Denver). So, we will be going to his mom's house for a Super Bowl party and I'm really looking forward to it!.

Moving on from the Super Bowl. Today marks day 1 of T25 again. Knock on wood that I can stay healthy this time. Today is also day 1 of going mainly wheat free. I have been researching this for some time. There are differing views on whether or not taking wheat out of your diet helps Lupus patients. I've spoken to other Lupus sufferers and some say it changed their life, some said it did absolutely nothing. Honestly, that's to be expected. Lupus varies so much person to person. But, I figure it's worth a shot and definitely can't hurt.

I have to share a NSV victory today, because let's face it, it's been a hot minute since I've had any victories - scale or no scale. One of my goals for 2014 was to incorporate more yoga into my routine. Also, Lupus beneficial. As I was laying in bed Friday night, I decided my goal for the weekend would be to try Crow Pose. Now, this is something I never fathomed I could ever do. I've always been amazed by people that could pull it off.

Shockingly, it didn't take me long at all to be able to hold it. Understand that this is not a full crow position. But I'm still extremely excited about my progress so far. My goal is to be able to achieve a full crow (arms clear under the arm pit) by the end of the year.

Where Do I Go From Here?

I came into this week motivated and ready to "officially" start the T25 program. The weekend was amazing. I was finally feeling healthy after months of reoccurring illness. Saturday, Wyatt and I got just over 2 miles in, and I even managed just over 4 miles on Sunday. I haven't ran that distance since I first got sick back in October.

Things were good. I was in a positive place. Monday went smoothly. Wyatt joined me for my T25 workout that evening. My can-do attitude was back. As the evening progressed, I started to feel off. By the time I got Wyatt to bed, the body aches and chills hit me like a ton of bricks. I ended up with a horrible flu bug. Water was not even staying down. It.was.miserable.

Timing could not have been worse. I had a big work deadline this week, and I'm the only person trained to do my job. I ran into the office Tuesday morning long enough to get the guys lined out for the day and grab some things to work from home. Not much work ended up happening, because I was completely incapable of keeping my eyes open and slept all day and night.

Three days later, I'm feeling healthy-ish, again. Somehow, I managed to still complete my deadline yesterday and am once again trying to get set up for a new week.

It's been a challenging winter for me in many ways. Frustration with my health issues is an understatement, but I've managed to stay strong and trudge forward. That is, until Monday night. Honestly, months of anger, frustration and sadness came pouring out all at once this week. Sometimes I just reach a point where enough is enough. Why do I have to have Lupus? Why do I have to be sick all the time? Why can't I make it one, just one week, without being sick? It's exhausting at times. And this past week it just finally caught up with me. One can only take so much without reaching their breaking point.

I sometimes wonder why God gives us the challenges he does. But, I'm a believer that everything happens for a reason. There are lessons to be learned and good can come of anything.  

There's very little doctors can do to prevent this. There is no cure for Lupus. In fact, there's very little treatment at all. One option I have, is to permanently go on steroids. I'm not ready to take that step. I'm 27. I don't want to live with those side affects the rest of my life. For me personally, that's no way to live.

I hate sitting down to my blog, just to tell everyone I'm sick again. Seriously, I know it sounds ridiculous. Believe me, it feels ridiculous. So, I just stayed away from writing for a few days. Instead, I've been proactive and doing some research this week. I am not ready to try medical treatments. But, I can't sit back and just accept being sick all the time until I'm out of this Lupus flare. Who knows how long it will last?

I'm still diving in further to some theories I've found, tweaking some things, and learning more,  but I will share once I have it all figured out. Basically, I plan on making some drastic changes to my diet and see if that will help my flare-ups. While I normally (read: previous to the past few weeks) eat very clean, I've always been an "everything in moderation" girl. I firmly believe that to be true for a healthy person, and I have repeatedly said that throughout my journey thus far.  My opinion of that will never change. However, I am not a healthy person. I never can be, truly. But, I can make the best of the cards I've been dealt.

Choosing to refuse medical treatment is a big decision. And one that I have never made lightly. But, by doing so, it may require some drastic changes in other areas of my life. In the mean time, I'm getting that positive attitude back and am ready to kill T25. Once again, the "official" start date has changed to Monday. Knock on wood.

Happy Birthday, Steve

I've been on a small blogging break this week while dealing with more health issues and will be back next week. However, I'm back for a short minute today as I'm full of so many emotions.

In June, it will have been two years since I lost someone very dear to me in a very tragic, work related, accident. It was a horrific day, that ended in a phone call from OSHA giving me the devastating news. A day that will be engraved in my brain until I take my last breath.

Not only was Steve my boss, but he was a dear friend. He was a second father, confidant, and my son's great uncle. Over seven years ago, he took a chance on me. He took me under his arm, and not only taught me about the business, but life itself. So much of who I am today, is because of his example and the lessons he taught.

Today, I just need to say:

 Happy Birthday, Steve. As I sit in your office, comfortable in the special chair you bought for my back problems, with the warm snow boots you surprised me with on my feet, surrounded by so many memories, I will fight back the tears today. I will smile through the pain. Today is your day. The one day a year, I could always guarantee you to be in a good mood. :) So you relax up there and kick your feet up. I'll take care of business down here, and eat some carrot cake for you.

The Things Nightmares are Made of

As I've been feeling better the past couple of nights, I have managed to fall into some pretty deep sleeps. I mean, if the house caught fire, I probably wouldn't stir. Clearly my body has needed it, but it's come with some pretty insane dreams.

Dreams have always fascinated me. Back in my school days, I even did a large research paper on the topic. Fun fact: everyone dreams, whether you remember them or not. While you sleep, your brain takes things from your short term memory and moves them to your long term memory bank. This transfer of information leads to the jumbled mess of a dream.

Lucid dreaming is when the individual is aware what they are experiencing is, in fact, just a dream. I am a lucid dreamer. This information will come to play later in the story.

I fell asleep shortly after my head hit the pillow. Before 9pm, even. Next thing I know, I see myself standing in a crowd of runners. It didn't take long to realize I was standing at a race start. I'm watching myself stretch and talking to a group of people that were clearly friends, although I'd never seen them before.

Seconds before the race is to start, I begin to strip ... butt naked. At this point, I don't notice anyone else in the dream and start screaming to dream-me, What are you doing!?!?!? Dream me looks over at real me and points to a sign: Nude 5K.

The crowd of other runners disappeared, and dream-me took off to run a 5k - completely naked. I knew I was dreaming, but was still completely mortified.

Another fun fact: These nude races exist. I did not know this until I googled this morning...

When I first woke up, I was thinking what on earth just happened? I am a firm believer, after significant research, that our dreams can be a great tool in life. I do believe that there are reasons and lessons behind them. At least, there have been in my own life.

I tend to be a little shy and incredibility insecure when it comes to my body. I mean, I hesitate to wear tank tops in the summer for crying out loud.

Who knows what I was trying to tell myself in this dream, but one this is for certain... it's been way too long since I've gotten a run in and it must happen. Soon. Before I completely lose my mind and strip for a run...

I am...

I have this list full of blogging topics I want to discuss, but even with that in hand, I've been at a loss of words this week. I am easing back into my fitness routine and plan to jump in full force this weekend with some runs and T25 starts Monday. Until then, I feel as though I don't have much to say in the world of fitness and health. Can't preach what you aren't currently practicing, right?

I could sit here and tell you that I haven't ate well this week. In fact, I had ice cream last night. The world is ending, right!? I skipped last night's workout for some much needed sleep. Blah blah... but no one wants to hear that stuff. Here's what not to do, folks! Nah, we'll skip that post.

I'm slowly, but surely getting back on my feet and next week I'll be back with a can-do attitude.

In the mean time, there are many new readers out there this past month. So glad to have you all here! Today, let's recap a little bit of who I am. Some things you may know, some you may not, and many you probably don't care to know...

Middle child in a family of only brothers and male cousins

Completely double jointed

I hate clothes shopping. Give me all the accessories!

Accident prone. I've broken growth plates in both feet along with many stress and hairline fractures. Surgeries, stitches, ER visits.

Clumsy... see above

Lover of all things green

Live for the "great outdoors". In fact, I'd be perfectly happy living in a cave the rest of my life.

Love to camp and hike

Mommy to an amazing 2.5 year old, Wyatt

I have Lupus, Fibromyalgia and Rheunalds

Born and raised in Wyoming

I have a love/hate relationship with running. 

I work full time

Crafter. Mainly crochet and quilting

Dr. Pepper. "23 Flavors. One great taste!"

Lover of all things sports. (with the exception of soccer)

I tend to go slightly overboard for all holidays.

I love all things food.

Prefer tea over coffee

Allergic to beer and wine

I've watched the entire series of Gilmore Girls over 10 times, start to finish.

How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days can always make any day better.

Very, very stubborn. I admit it.

Love all things furry.

Love a good mystery or fantasy book

Nothing makes me happier than time with my family.